Whenever I start writing a story (or re-writing/editing a straight story), I keep getting stuck writing a lot of background and exposition before being able to get to the sex and mind control. It needs to be written, otherwise the story won’t make any sense, but I’m having trouble making it interesting and engaging.
For example: I’m writing an edit of this story, in which a virus is unleashed. Women become curvier/sexier, and they need to drink cum or they’ll die. Men get hairier, their cocks double in length, they exude pheromones that attract and arouse women, and their libido increases so they can cum 4-5 times a day. Scientists develop synthetic sperm so that women don’t need to suck or die, but they’re still horny sluts who will drop to their knees to pretty much any guy.
In my edit, women aren’t affected at all. Gay men get hairier, their cocks double in size, their libido increases, and they exude pheromones that arouse straight men, whether they like it or not. Gay men cum copious amounts of special semen. Straight men get dumber and more muscular; some get hairier while others become hairless; their asses start self-lubricating; they need to drink gay men’s cum or they’ll die. Doctors develop synthetic homo-sperm so nobody will die, but it’s nowhere near as good as the real thing. As for bisexuals, anyone who is a kinsey 3 or higher gets the gay transformation, and anyone who is a kinsey 2 or lower gets the straight transformation.
That’s a lot of exposition, and I’m not sure how I can naturally integrate that into the story without it being overly long or boring. Does anyone have any tips?
In my humble opinion, the only way to do it is by having the story start with having one of your ‘straight’ characters suddenly get the feeling he wants to have sex with a guy and then write the sex scene. After that you can do the exposition in a flashback. You could do this several times, building and layering the background exposition each time so that by the end of the story, the reader knows exactly why ‘straight’ character X suddenly wanted to bury his dick in another man’s ass.
First of all your edit sounds marvelous and very enjoyable. I would totally enjoy reading the idea. I like what happens to men, especially how some straight guys go all hairless while others get more hair. Maybe all straight guys could also gain bubble butts naturally and all gay guys also get their intelligent boosted.
As for your question one option is to give the main character an interest in knowing what is going on and so he reads reports or analyzes things. That way in character it seems reasonable for him to learn about the increases and developments and such.
Another option is for you to add the data at the very end of the chapter/story in a sort of databank slash wiki style article. Its a bit out of the story but it works if you are planning on making the story go further.
Though this is basically a sex story a part of me wonders how women in this world take to the idea that gay men can easily have fun with their boyfriends and husbands and said people cna’t do anything about it because they want it, they need it, they love it.
Another option is to write in a significant introductory section (I suspect it’d be a whole chapter) where the focus is on the changes being discovered. The virus begins to spread slowly, and men are noticing the changes but without understanding what’s going on precisely. This gives you a bit of freedom to explore the symptoms without necessarily needing everything to be about that. You might have a character who’s noticing an increased libido, for instance, and who then starts to experience other issues. Maybe he goes and talks to his doctor (which lets you get a whole lot of symptoms out of the way at once, since the point of the visit is to discuss them). If the doctor’s straight, maybe he succumbs.
Admittedly, though, that solution involves a lot of writing that doesn’t necessarily feed into where you want your main story to go.
The problem in most stories is that you need to mix your data dump with action. In the types of stories we write, action means sex.
I suggest writing the first chapter or a prologue from the perspective of one of the scientists making the synthetic semen. He could be working at the lab late one night on it, possibly with another scientist, which would give them the chance to discuss things with each other, mostly for the sake of the reader. Then, before it gets too boring, one of their coworkers, who happens to be a gay man, shows up, all transformed already and uses his pheromones for some late night sex action. The two scientists could even lament the changes their going through, and how much more difficult they make the work. Or how tense things are with their wives since they started… well, you know. They don’t really want to talk about it, since they’re a little ashamed at how badly they need it now.
If the gay guy that comes to the lab that night is the main character, great. If not, you could revisit the scientists later on.
Or, that could be one short story created in the new world you’re fleshing our. Absqrst’s Pandemic stories were like that: a big world change happened, but each part was following different characters.
I actually just finished a series with a similar gay transformation virus premise that was five parts. Each chapter followed a different group of guys at a different point in the timeline of the virus. I led the world exposition as like “internet rumors” and seemingly fake cases, to people on the streets know it’s real, and then it being completely proven knowledge of the illness exists everywhere. So, depending on where you’re writing the story on the virus’s timeline, you could always use news or the internet as a source of information.
Another way you could do it is by writing in third person omniscient and dispersing it throughout the story as like a condescending narrator (who may or may not be behind the virus) watching people fall prey to it like a “little do they know that XYZ is going to happen to them” kind of stuff.
Generally, my only rule for exposition is that I try to avoid blocks of exposition outside of action. The only exception is if it’s at the beginning of a story. I don’t mind dumping more exposition towards the beginning of a story to set it up and then moving into the action and sexy parts. The most important thing is making the exposition interesting enough to keep the reader around until you start doing sexy stuff.
Thanks for your suggestions everyone! I think I’m gonna try a mix of your suggestions, writing my own introductory chapter, describing the world through various minor characters. 3 paragraphs about a guy who suddenly wants to suck off his gay coworker, 5 paragraphs about the scientists developing the synthetic sperm, a government PSA about the virus and its effects, that kind of thing. I could try and intersperse this with the original first chapter, but there’s already a lot of exposition in the original story, and adding more would tip the balance between sex and worldbuilding too much. This was really helpful, thanks again!
I feel like along with the cock size increase and maybe the intelligence gain, a lot of secondary male sex characteristics would be enhanced, like facial and body hair, deeper voices, etc.
What really interests me is how the straight men would change. In the original story, the women all seemed to change in pretty much the same way. I wouldn’t want the changes to be static in my version. Men have a variety of different ways to look attractive imo, and it would be interesting use that.
Some will get more muscular, hairy, and bearded, a big lumberjack type. Some will be tight, lean and flexible, not an ounce of fat so you can see every muscle perfectly, like a male ballet dancer. Some will be buff and broad-shouldered but hairless, sort of like a marvel superhero (think of captain america’s hairless chest in CA:TFA).
I can’t overstate how much I agree with you on the fact that the changes to straight males aren’t static. That instead of everyone being one trope there are numerous types that form, like you say. I think that is really hot. I think its also a nifty direction to go.
As a person who actually likes those various types near equally it saddens me to read stories where everyone becomes like a lumberjack or everyone becomes a twink or whatever. I want variability in the way the subs look. Its more fun that way.
Especially for that gay guy who decides to collect one of each different type of new straight man, for the fun of things. hehe
I mean I imagine a gay guy whose straight roommates become his. Or the boss of a company and his subordinates. Or heck the gay second working as HR or Admin for a family construction business where the father owner and his son chief workers become his. hehe
But I also like the idea that yes there are changes and yes the once straight like to suck cock and have a big bubbly ass, and yes when they get super horny thought seems to fade, but beyond that when they aren’t horny, when they are content their focus and intelligence are greater, and their health is the best it has ever been as negatives seem to have been cured. It amuses me.
May I suggest another technique? Some stories begin with an episode that functions has a preparation and premonition of things to come. Think of the movie JURASSIC PARK where the brief introductory scene has the workers handling a caged velociraptor who attacks one of the handler’s arms. This episode is never referenced again; but it sets the mood to be scary. Similarly in your case, you could have a situation - make it scientists or, for example, animal trainers - who observe the strange behavior of animals, prompting questions in the observers’ minds. Then cut to your story. In this way, you’ve set up an expectation of what is to happen.